Its a Love hate Relationship

Pinkish

 For what ever reason.. It doesn’t matter how hard i work on some of my pictures I end up disliking them. Yes i know its a Virtual world where things Glitch and You have to smooth lines and and Liquify Areas in photoshop to make it look even . but still as I love everything in this shot .. I’m thinking its my face that throws the like off for this picture it doesn’t look like my normal Avi and I’m wearing a skin that Ive been wearing a lot lately. Just in case you wanted to know I’m totally in Love with new Glam affair skin that’s at the Collabor 88 right now , its rather different than a lot of their other skins and making a Different appearance  with a skin on my Avi is always intriguing to me. I’m actually thinking that because I often use different hair colors and the mix of such a “loud” make up choice is just different its not my norm so it looks off tome. The Awesome head piece is By the Ever so Lovely Azoury I just love their work and I’m pretty sure if I met the creators in Rl I would have to just squeeze them even though I’ve never had a real  conversation with them.. They just make awesome stuff.. The Leggings are from Beautiful Dirty Rich and I found out about these from the Most Recent Issue of the Eclipse Magazine which I worked on some.. When I’m not going a million miles a minute losing my mind..lol One of the models in one of the shots( not taken by me) were wearing the leggings which I instantly was glad that there was a style card wrote up under the shot.  The Jacket is Being Featured at this Round of Instruments its by Sascha’s Designs . The chair Is by Convair and is currently at the round of the Liaison Collaborative , The pose is not part of the chair its a Pose that I made with my Anypose BVH hud .. I also made the Background with Sl building stuff and textured it with textures I have. I do that often, make my own sets that is.. I find that Building and actually Decorating can be rather relaxing sometimes.

Style Card

Headpiece: Azoury – Walkyeries Head Acessory Fushia 1 ( IDK Event)

Necklace: Azoury TCG Gift 2nd Anniversary ( The chapter Four)

Hair: Besom ( Formally Known as Milk)- Iggy Brown

Bangs: Chemistry Hair Willow 2 Short bangs

Jacket: SAS Winged Black Jacket ( The instruments)

Legging Boots: Beautiful Dirty Rich Platform Leggings  Pink

Eyeshadow: Zibska – Jaleiah 05 ( uber)

Bottom Liner: Nox Slash Liner Pink ( The Dressing Room)

Brows: Pink Fuel Drow Eyebrows Arched/Sharp Tinted Brown

Lips: BlackLiquid– Culture Shock Lips

Umbrella: Alchemist  Delusion World Gatcha 512 Umbrealla Pink

Chair: Convair– Mackintosh Chair 1 Black ( The Liaison Collabrative )

 

Social Disorder

Social Disorder

Todays Blog is kinda personal and im actually going to talk about myself and not all about Second life items.. Ive kinda had this topic on my mind and it keeps coming up a lot lately.. in all actuality  I’m not sure if people really know how far my social Awkwardness is .. If you have chatted with me in world  and you’ve gotten to know me you may know how odd i can be.. but I havent always been that way. Before I had 3 kids and was in my 2nd marriage I was social and maybe considered the life of the party.. Im noticing now that I am rather distant from people face to face.. I like my space but then again i dont like to be alone.. its boring.. and who is gonna laugh at my randomness when im alone? me probably.. but still. I’ve been having a hard time mentally with thinking where my friendships lye as far as who really trusts me who really cares about me and Who just thinks im a gullible idiot. I observe a lot .. and I may not always be able to give you the most sound advice . cause i often stick my foot in my mouth. but when i do give you advice its from my heart and its the best way i know how to put words together to let you understand it. Im not good with words I never have been.  I tell people that im not good with advice but it doesnt mean i dont care, cause i do. I care way to much for people who have no clue I exist . This being the reason why i get my feelings hurt way to easily.  Some of my friends have noticed my coldness in the last few weeks. A month or so ago I had became really depressed and i went to the doctor and had myself put on medicine . I’ve been on an anti depressant now for over 2 months and last month was just really hard for me i don’t know why i just felt really down and when i get this way everything suffers.. my relationships , me , my family.. because i just don’t feel like i have a connection with people and this makes it so much worse. Ive just really been trying to pinpoint my set off point of why i get into these funks and then why last month just sucked so bad for me and I really don’t know yet.. I don’t think its the medicine but its very possibly that what i keep to myself and i don’t say out loud is the issue  it just all festers and eats away at me and makes me feel negative and distraught. I do want to thank those of you who do consider yourself close to me though cause you are what helps me keep it together to keep going and not give up.

Style Card

 Headpiece SAS Flower Explosion Black ( The instruments)

lashes: # He La # Heavy to watch Eye Black ( The Instruments )

Brows: Nox Beks Brows Black ( Dark Style Fair)

 Sweet Lips PXL v1.4

straps: Topazia Poppy Toes for walk in the Flower Black

Pose:  !bang stand 447

Scene

 Grass : Alergria Black Rise Grass

outline: Junk Metal Her Silver

mask : PM Mode Watcher

Birds Axix Lady Crow for pose 7 and Extra crows set

 Flowers : Topazia poppy Ankle for walk in the flowers